Sunday, December 30, 2007

Movies to see and to avoid...

I rented a couple of low budget films in anticipation of a quiet new years holiday that I was going to spend mostly packing.

However, being bored I ended up watching them early...

The first, called "Man From Earth" is sci-fi film written by veteren Star Trek and Twilight zone writer Jerome Bixby. The film had no special affects, no space ships, nothing but 5 scientists sitting around a cabin talking. That being said it was actually really quite good. Described as "Quietly restores dignity to Science Fiction of the mind" is not far off. Some familiar faces in the form of B-list actors all of whom did a fine job.

The second was "Werewolf: The Devil's Hound." I always worry when I see movies with "Title:Explanation" like say ... Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever which was really really bad. How bad? I fell out of love with Lucy Liu. It was that bad.

Sadly, this film actually made Ballistic look good.

One comentator summed it up thusly:

"This film starts out somewhere in Germany...but I'm not sure what part of Germany. Apparently, it's the part where people talk like pirates, because no one had a German accent. There are military-type people; only they're wearing khakis instead of cameo. It's really just one big mess from the get-go...not a good sign. At the first werewolf sighting...which looked more like a man in a Yeti costume...I knew I was in trouble. But I persevered and continued watching.

Then came the part where the fire marshall [sic] was smoking outside the fireworks shop...which is bad humor in itself. And as any good fire marshall [sic] would do, he throws his cigarette into the dumpster. Of course, there is gunpowder in the dumpster...why wouldn't there be? As any good fireworks manufacturer knows, you always throw your leftover gunpowder in the dumpster. Do not waste your money on this garbage. And if you know anyone that thinks this movie is great...slap them HARD!!"

I have to disagree with him, it didn't look like a yeti, it looked like the salt-vampire thing from the classic Star Trek series. I even backed up the film to verify.

Lets also not forget that according to the description on the back:

"In the dead of night, a tanker carries terrifying cargo in its hull - a descendant of the Lycanthrope family is captured by hunters with a diabolical agenda. But when the ship is misdirected, the bloodthirsty creature ends up on America's east cost..."

No, what happened in the film is the shipping company was supposed to deliver fireworks and delivered a werewolf instead. This happens to me all the time. Last week I ordered some books and UPS dropped off a Shoggoth instead.

Apparently saying the shipping company screwed up delivery doesn't make as good copy though...

What I am trying to say, is I have seen some awful films, suffered through some terrible acting and directing in my quest to see every werewolf/vampire/zombie film ever made, and have been lucky enough to find a few gems.

This was not one of them.

This in fact has cast some serious doubt as to my ability to continue on my quest without stronger medication.


  1. Here's one for you:
    Can a movie featuring a samurai werewolf possibly be boring, you ask me? And I answer you: yes, yes it can. Above is the proof.

  2. Another cinematic gem for you is Jesus Christ, Vampire Hunter: The Musical.

  3. I have in fact seen J.C Vamp killer. It at least had the advantage of not even remotely taking itself seriously....