Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Can't ... look...away...

Generally when I work on Architecture projects (like I am tonight) I watch Netflix on demand movies.

I've worked my way through a passel of documentaries, the entire first season of Heroes, and every Sci-fi film in their meager online available library.

Tonight I was in a strange mood so I started watching Mulva: Zombie Ass Kicker!

I have actually paused working on my project (but still watching this movie) to type up this post.

I have discussed before some really bad movies.

This is a whole new strange world of badness.

Their tagline is "Low Budget films: Better then suicide."

I'm not so sure.

I mean, it actually makes Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter look high budget and professionally acted.

YE GODS AND SMALL FISHES!

Sorry. Bit of liveblogging. This film contains most scarily dirty, depraved sexual suggestion I have ever heard. All without using a single profanity.

Dare I reproduce it here?

Okay, I will, but it is not for the faint of heart... or the vivid imagination.

Still here?

Really?

Why?

You can skip ahead.


Here it is.

Speaking: Crazy Kinky Lady wearing football shoulder pads adorned with antlers and a fur cape:

"Oh Jimmy-hat. It's time to come please me with your rendition of the Styx classic "Mr. Roboto" whilst you rub my bleeding hereafter."

I'll let that sink in for a bit as I go scrub myself with some caustic chemicals.


That is just a tiny little sample of how strange, surreal, depraved and painful film this is.

It also contains a main character so obnoxious as to make Jar-Jar Binks look like a good choice in ANY film.

And yet... I can't stop watching...

*Edit*

OMG. There is a sequel... it was actually worse then the first. But in completely new and different ways.

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